Balanced acts and the concept of energy exchange in relatiosnhips
In
relationships we mostly fail to understand the concept of energy
exchange. Sometimes we have people we so much care for in our lives, yet
with all their good intentions, they have a learned pattern of taking
so much emotional and mental energy while giving back very little.
They conserve their energy in ways that border on emotional stinginess and feelings poverty. What they fail to see is that with such approach they drain us so we end up unable to give anymore. Then we are labeled as moody, unstable emotionally and one cannot depend on us for 'constant" emotional supply.
The truth is, we are like anything else in this universe, need re-charging to continue to give. The amount of energy (emotional, spiritual, mental) between two people will remain the same and can be drained easily and only can expand and multiply with a free none obstructed exchange, only then both will have enough within that exchange to feel happy and content.
When we have someone in our lives with a big capacity to give emotionally, we should not just take and hold on giving back thinking that they have unlimited supply of emotional energy. Worse than that is when we start holding back thinking we are challenging them to give even more in order to hold onto us (as in the pulling back or I do not want to disclose my feelings game). This is a destructive, selfish, and hurtful abusive pattern that only serve to destroy our happiness and drive even the most caring person away from us.
What we should do is create reciprocation within the relationship, mutual care, and acts of adoration and support. We should refrain from acts of rejection and hurt no matter how we think of those acts as being 'honest" or an insurance against their disappointment if the relationship did not work. Only then the energy of love will expand and be more than enough for both of us and even spill over to the world around us. Generosity in love breeds generosity, kindness breeds kindness.
Holding back creates negative feelings that no matter how spiritual we are or how generous emotionally we might be, it inevitably will trigger our deepest hurts and with that resentment and withdrawal. Work with people humanity first with that the angel in them will show bringing you even more happiness.
They conserve their energy in ways that border on emotional stinginess and feelings poverty. What they fail to see is that with such approach they drain us so we end up unable to give anymore. Then we are labeled as moody, unstable emotionally and one cannot depend on us for 'constant" emotional supply.
The truth is, we are like anything else in this universe, need re-charging to continue to give. The amount of energy (emotional, spiritual, mental) between two people will remain the same and can be drained easily and only can expand and multiply with a free none obstructed exchange, only then both will have enough within that exchange to feel happy and content.
When we have someone in our lives with a big capacity to give emotionally, we should not just take and hold on giving back thinking that they have unlimited supply of emotional energy. Worse than that is when we start holding back thinking we are challenging them to give even more in order to hold onto us (as in the pulling back or I do not want to disclose my feelings game). This is a destructive, selfish, and hurtful abusive pattern that only serve to destroy our happiness and drive even the most caring person away from us.
What we should do is create reciprocation within the relationship, mutual care, and acts of adoration and support. We should refrain from acts of rejection and hurt no matter how we think of those acts as being 'honest" or an insurance against their disappointment if the relationship did not work. Only then the energy of love will expand and be more than enough for both of us and even spill over to the world around us. Generosity in love breeds generosity, kindness breeds kindness.
Holding back creates negative feelings that no matter how spiritual we are or how generous emotionally we might be, it inevitably will trigger our deepest hurts and with that resentment and withdrawal. Work with people humanity first with that the angel in them will show bringing you even more happiness.
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